We've found this especially true when it comes to adult children. Not all children get what they need during childhood. Maybe they feel they weren't loved enough, or got enough 'parent' time.
Whatever the reason families can be hard to get along with sometimes. But, we know how to handle this... we pray for their peace, and our peace. We become willing to let them have their own feelings. We allow them to ask us questions about the past that may help them heal their own wounds.
I remember holidays as being some of the worst days of my life. I still get anxious when Thanksgiving and Christmas roll around. Being around family can bring up a great many mixed emotions. How I handle it is to try and stay in the moment. If an intrusive thought from the past bubbles up, I quickly stamp it out with an affirmation: "I am a child of the Creator." When I take a moment to reassess the reality of the moment I see clearly.
I am no longer a child. I can no longer be hurt the way I once was. I am free, because I AM a child of God, and I know I am full of love, forgiveness, and gratitude, that I, and members of my family, have changed.
Sometimes we have to end our relationship with members of our family for our own physical or mental health. It can be very difficult to do. But, as Emmet Fox tells us in the Golden Key, in moments like these we need to focus on God, and not on the problem. It can be very difficult to do, but with practice it becomes easier.
Whatever your family situation is, it can be healed, or made better, by turning to God. Feeling God first, before we speak, before we fall into old habits, or before we fall apart emotionally, we find the power to put love first. Then the words are not harsh; then we don't fall into habits we have struggled to overcome; then we feel safe to be around those we care about.
One of the hardest family challenges occurs when we receive an emotional rejection from someone dearly loved by us. This can be exceedingly painful, overwhelming, and unfathomable. It helps a little to understand we can not control the thoughts, feelings, and actions of others. Most importantly, relief begins with faith and conviction that God is in control, and Spirit will ultimately handle the problem for us. Moreover, we can shine a Light around our loved-one who is making some hurtful decisions about us. See this person enfolded by Love Light and know that whatever the outcome, the Father loves and cherishes all of us unconditionally for eternity.
When this process of releasing the problem to God, clicks, then it is possible to forgive ourselves and others for mistakes that were made. We can also go within and ask the Inner Voice, "How can I handle this Lord?" Then simply go on with our life and follow what we are guided to do.
When we remember we are all, everyone of us, God's Children, we can successfully move through the maze that is sometimes called family. God will never let anyone of us down, when we turn to Him.
In Love, Light and Peace!
Gary and Susan Eby