Why I didn't turn to Spirit in the first place is because of my own stubborn will. I had forgotten what hope can do for a person. I put on my head phones, closed my eyes, and listened to nature sounds. I envisioned a world of my own making. I pictured my back glowing in a golden Light. I could feel my pain easing. I had Hope.
Slowly, gently, the pain began to subside. I stayed in that state for about an hour. When I was finished and came back to this time and place, I felt much better.
Hope is a powerful spiritual equation. Along with all the other things we have talked about, hope may be the most important.
I have lived a dangerous life. I have been severely abused as a child and young woman. But what brought me through it all was Hope. I didn't know or understand God's plan for me. But I still felt hope even in the darkest hours. I knew 'something' would save me from my retched life.
As a girl, I used to fantasize that a huge chair would come down out of the sky. It would be encrusted with all sorts of jewels making it sparkle and shine. I believed once I sat in that chair God would take me up to heaven. My hope never wavered. I knew because I had hope, even at a young age, I was chosen by God to speak of his wonder, his glory, his peace.
How I knew this was because I was still alive.
Hope is given to us a birth. No matter what situation we face, be it an abusive past, addictions we are struggling with, a poor relationship, financial pressure, or any other appearance of suffering, we feel deep in our hearts presence of Hope. The hope we feel is a tiny spark of our own Divinity. Hope will never die; it is with us always. It leads us inevitable to the Father ever present, all powerful, full of Love and Joy.
It may be hard but if you think about it, no matter how deep or painful your situation is, there is the miracle of Hope that keeps you going.
I had hoped to find a man who loved me for who I am, and would treat me well. I carried this hope with me until the day Gary knocked on my apartment door and introduced himself.
Neither of us knew what was coming regarding my Dissociative Disorder and my Bipolar condition due to my past trauma. However, through all of it, Gary stood by me devotedly. He loved me unconditionally and helped me find my Divine Self, leading to many miraculous healings.
Throughout it all, I held on to my Hope and that small twinkle I started with became a huge part of myself. Just a little Hope can start you on your path to healing your life.
Yours in everlasting Hope,
Gary and Susan.